Anonymous Survivor Story: 'No One Took Me Seriously'
Why Do You Want To Tell Your Story? Because no one took me seriously once I realised what had happened, but I only realised what had happened years after it took place.
Tell Us Your Story I was around 8, maybe 7 at the time, grandparents were visiting and nothing out of the ordinary happened until it came time for me to go to bed. Grandma was tucking me in that night because she didn't see me very often and I was lying on my back when she went to kiss me goodnight and she kissed me on the mouth. I felt really uncomfortable and the next morning she even mentioned it to the whole family at breakfast. It was strange and didn't feel right but didn't take any action.
I was 10 years old.
Grandma was looking after my sister and I after school because both my parents were at work. We had a staircase leading up to our front door and as we climbed the stairs I was in the lead as always and the next thing i knew grandma stuck her hand up my leg of my shorts and squeezed my bum.
Grandma often looked after us after school and I remember having lots of arguments and fights with her during this time, we were moving house regularly and all the change wasn't good for me so I was an emotional wreck anyway, but part of me now thinks that this event probably added to a lot of those fights without my proper knowing.
I was 15. Older now and more aware of the world. I was staying at grandma's house because basketball camp was in her city so I stayed with her while i went to my trainings each day. Every day she dropped me off and picked me up from my day long trainings. On the 2nd night as I walked to my bedroom, she passed the comment "I'll have those dumplings" And I knew she was referring to my bum again. I finally said enough was enough and I didn't appreciate that comment. She claimed that it was just her culture and how she was raised (it may have been, but that doesn't make it Okay). This was the first time I realized something wasn't right and it sparked the memories of the prior events I have written about.
When I confronted my family about it they just brushed it aside. "It probably wasn't as bad as you remember" and comments like that. I'm not mad at my family at all for their comments. Grandma was still part of the family and they didn't want to upset her. I don't blame them. I never went to anyone else about this because it didn't affect my life too much, not severely scaring and I don't have nightmares about the events. But it still frustrates me that we live in a world where sexual abuse against men and young men isn't taken seriously at all. Yes it happens a lot less then females and it's awful and unforgivable regardless of who it happens to. But I wish the world took this more seriously.
No one really considers grandma part of the family now anyway... after poppa passed she became bitter towards everyone and burnt most of her bridges.... shows true character over time I guess