Why Do You Want To Tell Your Story?
I don't know, I'm not sure if this happened or not, I't has just been mentioned by a friend that I share characteristics with people who have been abused and I would like to talk about it with a supportive community.
How Did You Hear About Us?
I searched 'I think I may have been sexually abused as a child' and stumbled upon this site.
Tell Us Your Story
I can't remember being sexually abused, I do remember having reaccuring nightmares of sex at a very young age around 5-12 with women who held a powerful position in my life. eg. mother and teachers. I would dream I was affection with them, then feel betrayed like they were using me, and then I'd hit hem out of anger and they'd transform into a cat lady I was afraid of since I was 4, and she would hunt me down and I wouldn't wake up until I was dead or caught, sometimes fought her, othertimes I hid. Now I never understood what these dreams could of meant until I described it to my supervisor last month. And it was referring to me feeling affection towards my mother but feeling betrayed and angry not getting it back.
Recently my sister had shared that she was abused at a very young age ongoing till she was 10 by our mother and that has hit me quite hard how hurt she had been feeling this whole time, and how I hadn't noticed, and I'm unsure whether the rest of the family had recieved this abuse too.
We have been placed around men as kids who are now convicted pedophiles and child sex offenders.
A memory the family shares of me was when I was around 4 or 5 and we went to a family friends home who went to the same church, I don't remember but my siblings had brought up that I came up to everyone in the lounge and said that '**** touched my penis' and it was laughed off and made everyone embarressed especially myself, Even though I don't remember it I questioned why would a four year old make that up? and now my sister has opened up on her experience, looks back on that and thinks that it possibly did happen to me.